Grace felt…..prompted

Posted: 27th August 2011 by Duality in Dynamics, Scenes

Grace posted a bit earlier about a scene she initiated and I figured giving my side of what happened might not be a bad idea.  First off, a few facts.  I’m not a switch.  Submission holds nothing really for me.  I do enough of that with my body daily.  The same goes with pain.  I derive no pleasure from it.  So her exploration of this was completely for her own benefit.  I allowed it to happen for a few reasons.  The first is I try to live by the rule that I won’t do anything to her that I wouldn’t have done to myself.  Obviously there are a few things she likes that I won’t touch, but those things are completely by her design and not mine.  The second is she doesn’t initiate things often and I was curious as to how she would approach this.  She’s gotten a lot better with initiating of late and this was something completely out of her comfort zone.  That’s worth exploring.  Finally, I just wanted to see what she would do.  How much of what she was doing was a bluff?  Was she honestly exploring something or was she trolling for a reaction?  It was a non-typical reaction from her.  That always draws my attention.  I love getting new information about where her mind is at on a sexual level.

The pain thing, where she pulled on chest hairs, she should have known better on.  Its not like I have been secretive about my personal aversion to pain and sex.  Its great for her, a turn off if its done to me.  THAT got a reaction and a swift one.  The slaps I let go.  That falls into the category of things I do to her that I should be able to take myself.  And honestly when she’s bratty, a slap would be a good signal that she wants a scene to escalate.  It may have a use in the future so I bit down the reaction I had and let it go.  Her on top of me was….and she isn’t going to like this word… cute.  She may have been on top of me and grinding on my cock, but she wasn’t in control.  A bored, passive look on my face showed that to her quickly.  I said I wanted to see what she would do.  I didn’t say I wasn’t going to have fun doing it.

The talk we had afterward centered on the two biggest mistakes she made.  The first being she didn’t set the parameters.  She came at me, in what I guess could be described as a Dom’s first scene with a sub…kind of, with no clear understanding of what she wanted and what I was willing to do.  The second builds on that.  She had no plan.  Dom’s have to have some plan in their head about what they want to do and where they want it to go.  Improvisation is obviously a great thing for a Dom to have, but a Dom needs to build in their mind what they want to have happen and be prepared for what the sub is going to counter with.

Obviously she wasn’t trying to really Dom me.  At most you can say she was exploring a part of her sexuality that she had never looked at before.  And that’s the part of the scene that I enjoyed the most.  I may allow her to explore it a bit further with what little bit of submission I possess.  Tied up, blindfolded, and teased is about as far into submission as I will go.  And lets face it, once I’m free of my bonds in that scenario there will be a price to be paid.  Fortunately, Grace has unlimited credit with me to pay it with.